Well, we've been back for two months now and I still wonder when we are leaving for France. Of course it doesn't help that we still do not have our 51 boxes. I'm getting a bit impatient with that. It should have taken only 6-8 weeks and now it's been over 12. I'm 35 weeks with twins and when the boxes arrive, I will be 36 weeks. Not much time to unpack everything, but it could be worse.
I'm adjusting pretty well I think. I love the people in this area. Everyone is so friendly and very very nice! It's taken me a bit to open back up and remember that it's accepted to smile just for the sake of smiling.
The babies are doing great. I've met some friends and really fantastic neighbors, but I hesitate to tell people that I'm having a homebirth. I don't need someone else's stress. Both babies are head down, I eat very healthy (this has everything to do with a healthy pregnancy/delivery), and my midwives are fantastic. I did a short photo shoot for a friend of a friend and here is a photo from it - all 180 pounds or so of me:
It was for a project she was doing (non-profit). Check her out:
I know people think I am crazy for having a homebirth, at least the ones who don't know any better. And that's fine. I just really don't want a c-section, nor do I want to go to the hospital where someone is more likely to intervene and not let my body just go through the process of labor. I don't want any drugs. I don't want to be cut. This is a very private matter for me and I need to be in an environment where I feel safe, can move about freely and let my body do what it was designed to do, you know, like every other animal on the planet.
With twins, doctors would most likely intervene and find some reason to give me a c-section. This is not acceptable to me. Laboring women have 25% more chance of dying with a c-section, so regardless of what we're told, having a c-section is not the safer option. The real issue is that doctors feel that they need to do c-sections because it is best for them and their establishments. Who would "allow" me to labor for as long as I needed to with the shortage of nurses, the large volume of patients doctors have these days (they have to as some pay as much as $300 a day just for malpractice insurance), and the need for hospitals to turn beds over. Think about it - every other animal on the planet is expected/allowed to birth instinctually and without intervention, but womens bodies are not capable? I don't understand the logic of that.
"In the countries with the best maternal and infant outcomes - the Netherlands, Sweeden, and Denmark - women and babies benefit from lifelong universal healthcare, but that care is markedly different: obstetricians attend only high-risk pregnancies. The vast majority of laboring women get individual support from a midwife, are free to move about and birth in whatever position feels best, and are rarely induced, anesthetized, or cut. These countries have between a 14% and an 18% cesarean rate, and in the Netherlands some 20% - 30% of births happen at home with virtually no medical intervention at all. Their approach, opposite to that of the United States, is to support physiological birth, allowing labor to begin and progess in its own time, and intervening only when necessary." (Pushed by Jennifer Block). This makes sense to me and why a homebirth is the most logical thing to do. I do not want to be tied to a bed. When you are laying down, your pelvis contracts by up to 30%! In addition, on your back you are pushing the baby uphill, against gravity. How does this make sense?
When I went to interview doctors in France, they all pretty much laughed at me when I told them I wanted to deliver naturally. I asked if I could move about/not lay down and one of the doctors, said of course not. I had to lay down because how else would the doctor see to get the baby out? So it's all about what is best for the doctor and not the laboring woman and her baby? That's what it boils down to.
And for the argument "what if"... can be applied to a hosptial birth as well, but in my opinion there are more "what if's" to happen in a hospital seeing that more people are involved. What if whomever is in attendance is ill (can pass it to me/baby)? Or are at the end of their shift and what to hurry home? Or administered too much/too little whatever? Or misread a chart? Or had a bad day and it affected their work? etc... Fetal monitors do not work as we think they do. They are not accurate. We're so gadget reliant that we have lost touch with our instincts. I could go on, but that's all the time I have.
My two favorite books on the subject if you want more info:
Pushed by Jennifer Block
Active Birth by Janet Balaskas
dare to dream??? dare to follow your instincts... they are never wrong.